Between the Moments

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Do you ever wonder what happens between the moments? I mean... do you ever think about all the things that are happening around the world even as you take one breath?  There are babies being born, people dieing, a child tripping on a rock and falling over, a student receiving their first A, a young woman being abused, a man in his 25th year of prison for something he never did, someone being stung by a jellyfish, a new couple moving into their first home.  All these things are happening in every moment that we live our lives.

When pondering this, I find it easy to become sad. So many negative things happen around the world in one split second, yet at the same time so many wonderful things are happening. I know it doesn't mean much to mention this, but 

"I wish for one moment I could stop time

and reach out to all the people who

are hurting and give them a glimpse of hope,

a moment of relief, or a touch of grace." 

I wish that the Lord would prevent bad things from happening... unfortunately free will happened first. Even as I am sitting here, typing away, what is happening in the world?  I feel that if I knew, I wouldn't now what to do.  What I have now is faith that the Lord loves His people, and that each of our futures are to be with Him if we love Him and act out in His love enough for us to end up with him.  

John 8:4-12

4 Little children, you are from God and have overcome them,

for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.

5 They are from the world; therefore they speak from the world,

and the world listens to them. 6 We are from God.

Whoever knows God listens to us; whoever is not from

God does not listen to us. By this we know the

Spirit of truth and the spirit of error.

7 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and

whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.

8 Anyone who does not love does not know God,

because God is love. 9 In this the love of God was

made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son

into the world, so that we might live through him.

10 In this is love, not that we have loved God but

that he loved us and sent his Son to be the

propitiation for our sins. 11 Beloved, if God so loved us,

we also ought to love one another.12 No one has

ever seen God; if we love one another,

God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.

John 8:4-12

In love and hope,

Christine

Goodbye Rowing, Because of You I Grew

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Rowing-something I really found a place as a part of.  I learned to appreciate my body again.  I learned that I can be proud of something I can do for myself. I learned what it's like to be part of a team.  I felt like I accomplished something that appreciated me back.  But maybe I integrated it as a part of my world too quickly...again.

So what happened recently is this:  I was told that I was going to be able to join my university's rowing team (intense, right).  I put my heart into it and worked my hardest for many weeks.  No, I did not get to compete (even though I would have, had NCAA not been against my resume in the context of a student athlete), so I suppose I was never really part of  "the official team."  You see, I made the decision at the end of last year that

"This was something I was going to do for myself,
not for others, not for my resume
or my career, but for myself."  

I was looking forward to this as a defining part of my senior year of college, and as a part of taking care of myself and learning to find more value in myself instead of what I accomplish in the public eye.  I guess I thought about this in a too perfect sense.  So many times I get caught up in caring for others or doing different academic activities that I feel like I loose my sense of self-value that God gave me, not in what I do, but the being I am. Anyways, I decided that I would commit physically and emotionally to joining this team.  To make a long and frustrating story short...

If you are someone who is a full-heart, dung hoe, give it your all type person, (I hate to say this) but if a process does not seem to be flowing correctly, there are times when you have to divorce yourself from that thing that you made a piece of you (jez, it's like the Truman loss).  I dislike this because I presently try to focus on the positives and moving forward with every moment.  If only I was better informed I wouldn't have cried as much or invested my all into this!  It's like almost the same thing as last year and rowing, it's nearly pathetically comical.  The rowing I was doing did impact me wholly so I will take the benefits I have received from this and keep walking forward.


Done crying about this.  First world problems.  The end.


Still looking forward to living life,
Christine


Listen: Close your eyes, lie down, and feel the gravity dissipate.

P.S.  Thank you Coach for helping grow me as a person through rowing.  Thank you Brandi for your efforts.

Meet To Love Again Contest Winner: Theresa

Based on the To Love Again blog post, this Twitter  - Facebook - Blogger campaign aims to create a platform to safely feel inspired to share insecurities and overcome them.   This campaign focuses on helping all of us create a more positive outlook for us to use when self-reflecting and looking out at the world.


Meet Theresa.  Theresa is the fourth of our four #ToLoveAgain campaign representatives!  In the beginning of her photoshoot, Theresa didn't really know what to expect.  As I began talking with her and snapping photos, I told her how beautiful they were turning out.  As the photoshoot progressed we began to speak about our different insecurities.  Something Theresa shared that she has been dealing with for a while was her self-consciousness of her outward appearance in relation to her acne.  This is something that many women and men deal with.(Remember that time you had that big pimple on your face and felt like that was all people were looking at?)  One of the other #ToLoveAgain campaign representatives, Christine, also spoke to me about this same problem during her photoshoot which comes to show that many women deal with this.  Theresa shared how having acne is sometimes hard,

"It feels embarrassing and it feels like that is
the one thing people are always looking at."

Later, during her interview, Theresa reassured herself  how her appearance does not influence the ideas she conceives and how she should not be ashamed of her personal traits or allow others to make her feel lesser because of them.  It is very easy to think that the first thing people see will form the basis of how they treat you from then on.  If I told you that this was not so, I would be lieing.  There ARE people out there that judge you based on how you look(preppy, nerdy, geeky, "hottie") or what you do(sports or music).  But honestly, the handful of people that judge you based on that are not the type of people you should seek reassurance from.  Those are the people that need love to see that their value comes from something that lasts longer... it comes from the heart, the mind, and the soul.  Your appearance is here today, and can become a blemish or a wrinkle of age tomorrow.  Theresa also spoke about how important it is to

"Remind yourself that although you may be 
different from others, it does not mean 
you are lesser.  You still have 
great ideas inside you that deserve to be heard!"

She told me that when it comes to group situations, since she isn't a loud-leader type, she feels like it is sometimes easy to not contribute her input. Even when in a non-academic setting this feeling may creep easily in.  Just because you are shy doesn't mean you are not important.  Just because you aren't the first person to answer a question doesn't mean you are not intelligent.  Just because you may laugh different or speak different doesn't mean you have any less joy.  Just because you have less energy doesn't mean you are less worthy to receive attention.  

Being different does not mean that you deserve to be isolated.  It is wonderful to have a unique personality, to dress in a unique character, or even skip around sometimes.  Some situations call for a certain poise, like professional settings, however, don't loose your sense of joy, inquisition, peace, humility, or purity because you feel like being different from the rest of the world is a negative thing.


Be bold. Be beyoutiful. Don't be afraid to be different.


Learn more about Theresa and the other Campaign winners in the #ToLoveAgain campaign video:

Dear Theresa,

You are a wonderful creation of the Lord.  Your curious spirit is refreshing!  Remember that who you are consists of your mind, body, and spirit, and all of you is beautiful.  Don't ever let people "walk over you" through degrading comments, and if you need your voice to be heard, don't be afraid to stand out.  Remember that in order to fully love others, you need to first start with loving yourself.  I find it very courageous and honorable that you shared how hard it is to love... especially that you are striving to learn to love yourself and others.  Many people do not realize that they aren't fully loving others in life.  This shows your humility, which is something you should never let go of.  Be confident and humble.  Keep working hard to be YOUR best, and never be afraid to shine your light of curiosity and joy with others!  You are awesome, you are beautiful, you are inspiring.

In God's love,
Christine

To Love Again Contest Winner: Safra

Based on the To Love Again blog post, this Twitter  - Facebook - Blogger campaign aims to create a platform to safely feel inspired to share insecurities and overcome them.   This campaign focuses on helping all of us create a more positive outlook for us to use when self-reflecting and looking out at the world.

Meet Safra.  Safra is the third of the four young ladies comprising the #ToLoveAgain campaign. If I had to describe Safra in three words, those words would be curious, joyful, and empathetic.  This beautiful young woman will go to great lengths to bring smiles to people's faces.  In a way, she is a people pleaser, but because she loves people so much.  If this is you, gimme a nod and a "mmmhm."  As we spoke together about insecurities, we spoke about how hard it is to love others and to realize that they may not reciprocate that back.  Another thing we spoke about is how innocence is viewed by many people in a negative light. (What the heck, right?)  Safra and I share this in common.

Sometimes, people make us feel like expressing 

true joy in innocence and excitement 

is inappropriate for "our age" or "stupid." 

Is this because people in their early 20s have had true joy drained out of them as they are willingly corrupted by temporary joys?  When people see a joy they use to have but lost, something that they recall but can't come back to, does it hurt them?  Is this why they are sour towards the true joy that many people, like Safra and I and maybe you, share?  Is this why people see us happy and joyful in life's abundant love that is God-given and ask if we "are drunk?" (which I take as an insult most of the time, actually). Is the only happiness and freedom known to many found only when taking substances to create a false reality?  The joy we have comes from God's love which we find in people and we emit through smiles, laughs, and sharing.

As I interviewed Safra, she shared how hard it was to always remember to stay positive, especially when others treated her negatively or when she felt under stress to become some type of "perfect."  The thing that Safra struggles with, and probably many of you, is that you love people SO MUCH that you would give up hours of sleep to make them smile; in this, you may find yourself lost in pleasing others or working so hard towards goals that you forget to take care of yourself.  This reminds me of Matthew 7:3 when Jesus asks, "How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?"  Although Jesus is talking about sins, this verse reminds me of how important it is to evaluate yourself before you evaluate others.

Never forget that in order to best serve other, you need to 

first care for yourself. Being loving is a 

beautiful thing, but never forget that caring for

yourself is also part of caring for God's creation!

I personally see so much beauty and reflections of God's love in people who thrive off of the joy of others.  To all of you out there who love people so much that it sometimes hurts, I want to thank you for making the world a bit more beautiful, a bit more bright, and a bit more smiley, every time you let your love shine through! You are making a difference, even if you can't tell!

Check out the #ToLoveAgain campaign video below: 

Dear Safra,
Never forget how beautiful you are.  I am not talking about your physical appearance, although  you totally rock that, I am talking about the beautiful soul you have. Even if you feel like you want to embody a certain ideal of perfection, remember that the characteristics you have and that you are developing everyday are portions of perfection.  Do not let degrading comments from others push you to leave your innocence and wholesome outlook on life.  The Lord is the One you want to please, even if different moments may leave you feeling like you want to change who you are to fit in.  Never let people make you feel unintelligent or insignificant.  Take life with humility and confidence.  You are a light to the world, and your genuinely curious and loving personality, although misunderstood by some, is not very common nowadays for people in their 20s.  Live on, love on, continue on.  Thank you for your positivity.
God bless, Christine

To Love Again Contest Winner: Christine

Based on the To Love Again blog post, this Twitter  - Facebook - Blogger campaign aims to create a platform to safely feel inspired to share insecurities and overcome them.   This campaign focuses on helping all of us create a more positive outlook for us to use when self-reflecting and looking out at the world.

Meet Christine. Christine is the second of the 4 lovely ladies that make up this campaign!  Christine is definitely one of the most humble and down-to-Earth people I have had the chance to meet in college. I love how she is a hard worker, but doesn't take herself too seriously, and when she does, she takes effort to come back to terms with herself and reality.  A huge part of Christine's life is living out her faith.  As a devout Catholic, she makes the effort to go to daily mass and dress conservatively yet fun, so her quirky personality can shine through.  

Throughout Christine's photoshoot, we spoke about our insecurities.  Turns out that just the week before, she had spoken about her insecurities with another friend then saw this campaign and decided to enter the contest!  Christine's insecurities aren't so much based on her external appearance  but more on how she communicates with others.  She spoke to me about one of her insecurities use to be having acne, which is something one of the other #ToLoveAgain winners struggles with.  Christine's current insecurities are more intrinsic than external.  As a part of Christine's new outlook, she wants to learn to trust.   When it comes to trust, Christine wants to learn to trust guys.  How many of us have trouble trusting guys? I am sure many of us just raised our eyebrows or did a little nod to ourselves.  This is similar to what Paige shared.  But most of all, Christine wishes to better transmit Christ's love in all that she does, especially when it comes to giving to others.  

"If we are all worried about different things, 
it isolates us.  If everyone would just 
realize we are all insecure we could worry less 
about ourselves... and spend more time 
doing things that help us and help others."

I took this quote from Christine, which you can see more of in the behind the scenes video posted below.  I love how she is a very curious spirit.  She likes to learn and when she feels as though she may be stepping into any type of pretentious mindset, she tries to keep herself in check.  Something I relate to with Christine is how she wishes to emit Christ in her actions.  Although it is hard to constantly do what the Lord wants, if we truly love Him, Christ will be on our minds and in our hearts and our actions will reflect that. :)  Thank you Christine for reminding us of this!

Please leave comments on this post encouraging Christine and sharing what insecurities you have overcome or are dealing with right now.  Be sure to check back here over the next 2 weeks to meet the other 2 campaign ladies!!



Dear Christine,

Thank you for reminding me how important it is to keep Christ at the core of my outlook.  Thank you for sharing your insecurities with me and my readers!  Remember that we all can not be perfect our whole lives, and ignorance is a part of growing up.  Don't be hard on yourself for being ignorant at times.  Knowledge comes with time and experiences.  Be humble enough to ask for help when you need it and confident enough to live our your love for Christ out loud!  You are an inspiration for all of us whose insecurities lie in our outlook on life and our actions towards others. Stay wonderful and a princess of the Lord!

With Love,
Christine 

Meet To Love Again Contest Winner: Paige

Based on the To Love Again blog post, this Twitter  - Facebook - Blogger campaign aims to create a platform for adolescents to safely share insecurities and overcome them.   This campaign focuses on helping  create a more positive outlook for to use when self-reflecting and looking outward at the world.

Meet Paige.  Paige is the first of 4 young women that make up this campaign.  My photoshoot with Paige consisted of many laughs and giggles.  (Check out the behind the scenes video posted below.) When I asked her about her comfort level in front of the camera, she said that doing a photo shoot was a bit uncomfortable at first.  This photo shoot was not just pictures; Paige and I spoke about our insecurities, how this affected our outlook on life, and how doing this photo shoot would help others young people in the same situation as we are.  By the end of the session, we were having fun and sharing how we had many similar insecurities and how comparing ourselves to other people is good when it comes to academics and succeeding, but how it can easily become something to obsess over.  Paige was courageous enough to share the insecurities that at times hold/held her back for you all to see.  I was very inspired by how she described why some of her insecurities existed and how they can be overcome.  Something she said that I felt was very important to understand is, 

"We are each born with different bodies, 
I can strive to be healthy but that 
doesn't mean I will grow two inches and 
become a model.  I can do other great things 
with what I was given."  

What does this mean?  Interpret it as you will, but for me, it means to work with what you have and do your best.  In the photos above, you can see the top things Paige struggles with, that she wants to change.  Among  these challenges is learning to trust.  Surprisingly enough, all of the girls that are a part of this campaign said learning to trust was a challenge for them.  If you watch or read the news, hear people talk in the halls or in public, or have been hurt by a friend whom you trusted, it is easy to build an outlook where trusting people = danger.  Where it is very important to be careful and safe, it is also important to not close yourself off to the world.  From trust comes so many other beautiful things.  So yes, choose friends carefully, but do not close yourself off to the world because you are scared.    Remember this: We all have flaws, if we accept that we have flaws and learn to love ourselves regardless, we can look out into the world and in to ourselves with more love.  God loves you with your insecurities, and he wants you to run towards Him and follow him as the person he created you to be.

Please feel free to leave comments on this post encouraging Paige and sharing what insecurities you have overcome or are dealing with right now.  Stay posted over the next 2 weeks to meet our other 3 campaign ladies!!! ^_^

Dear Paige,
 I know how hard it is to want to be amazing at everything, don't we all want to be our best?  I think that a lot of times we strive to be the best at everything because we want the best for ourselves and those around us.  This is a challenge of being a super high achiever.  It's amazing to be able to work with other people where others have strengths we can work off of, like the way you can explain things where even the most confused person would be able to understand.  This is the beauty of living in community with others.  I am so glad you were able to help me in the #ToLoveAgain campaign, and your interview for the video was phenomenal.  Remember what a lovely young woman you are, and honestly, you have radiance that shines from you.  God created you as a princess, and in that, you are already wonderful.  

It is okay if you are not perfect, you are still awesome! Keep focusing on all the incredible things you are doing and all the people you leave a positive print on daily.

With Love,
Christine